In The Mind of Spider-Plush

This is the uncensored version. For the censored cut without all the swearing and the mentions of sex, click here. There are only 4 certainties in life: Death, taxes, Burger King messing up my damn order and having a Spider-Man review site look at Sins Past. You've seen everyone's reviews, you've seen everyone making fun of it (including Marvel themselves) and you even lived long enough to see it get retconned (Thanks, Nick Spencer). The story has it that in 2004, J. Michael Straczynski wanted to write a story about Gwen Stacy and Peter Parker's secret children that eventually tried to kill Peter... Odd, but okay. This is where Marvel's then editor-in-chief Joe Quesada comes in... So, Joe tells JMS that making Spider-Man have children would make the character seem like an old hag, and that would turn off new readers... Joe, I love you as much as I love my own son, but that is total bullshit, and you know it. You may be wondering, what happened last time? Well, Ezeki...

Originally reviewed on Wix back on January 29th, 2023. Gwendolyn Stacy was a character from the Amazing Spider-Man comic series, she first appeared in issue... I don't remember, but it was a Ditko issue. She was gorgeous, she was charming, she was perfect in every way. For a while, she was Spider-Man's girlfriend. Oh, and I suppose Mary Jane was there too. Spider-Man's biggest enemy of all time is the Green Goblin, aka Norman Osborn, a scientist CEO dude that had a little lab accident and now has another personality that thinks about nothing but mischief. Little problems that were presented in the series prior to this issue: Green Goblin knows Spider-Man's secret identity and everyone he loves, meaning that he can attack anyone at any point to hurt Spider-Man's feelings. Gwen Stacy does not like Spider-Man, I don't think she ever did, and she really started to HATE him because she believed that it was Spider-Man who murdered her father, George Stacy. The behind-...

Ezekiel Sims, a character that has made me ask multiple questions like "What" or "huh", but he's been relatively nice for the last couple issues or so. Now, since this review was meant for people that have already READ the stories, try to imagine a little kid in April, 2004 that has just seen Spider-Man on DVD (Spidey 2 came out in late June), his parents buy him ("him" because girls don't read comics... Well, they don't read Spider-Man comics) a subscription to The Amazing Spider-Man, and THESE are his first 3 issues... Pretty confusing way to start reading, but hey, my first comic was "New Ways To Die", and I'm still a fan. The thing is that these issues are pretty weird, complicated and honestly kinda dark for the young Spidey fan... Luckily, I am not a young Spider-Man fan, so let's take a look at The Amazing Spider-Man #506 by J. Michael Straczynski and John Romita Jr. This is The Book Of Ezekiel, Chapter one. The cover s...

I once challenged myself by reading 100 issues of Spider-Man, and you wanna know how many I remember? About 20. I planned to review this one as part of the birthday special, but I didn't. This one is really interesting because, as Al Sjoerdsma from SpiderFan.org  puts it, "...when I first saw this issue on the revolving comic rack back in 1967, I was really worried. First of all, I was ten years old, which is to say I was gullible. And second, I had seen plenty of other comics series come and go, never to be seen again. Who's to say it couldn't happen to Spider-Man? He wasn't the icon that he is today."   Which is why I gotta be so thankful that I don't read comics as they come out, because if I was gullible and saw that my favorite comic was ending, I would cry all day, I don't blame Al for thinking that. This comic features Spider-Man quitting, it's a moment that has been adapted... Well, actually not enough times! But the most memorable moment c...

 Spider-Man. J. Michael Straczynski. John Romita Jr.  Believe it or not, issue 500 was NOT the end of the Spider-Man legend, there's still a bunch of loose ends to tie up and LOTS of stories to make, so here's The Amazing Spider-Man #501, which is pretty much a new beginning for our web-head, this was Brand New Day before Brand New Day. LAST TIME: Spidey celebrated his birthday by looking at his beginning and his demise happen at the same time in The drive to Issue 1000 started here... Wait, they were already planning issue 1000? This is the cover, by Tony Harris, whom you may remember because he drew the covers for issues 57 and 58 (498 and 499). It depicts Spider-Man swinging by, and a taxi driver watching... Yes, this is one of those boring covers, but do not fret, the end of the "Have Spider-Man do something cool" covers is near, only to come back for a little bit. The title of this one is "A Saturday In The Park With May", GEE, I WONDER WHAT THIS IS ABO...

I watched a friend's stream a few days ago and found out something crazy about Doki Doki Literature Club. Shoutout to  https://www.twitch.tv/starlightrld , drop a follow and tell her I sent you. So, after entering the game for the 5th time, we are greeted by the same fucking shit I've been playing for days, with Sayori forcing us to join the literature club and stuff, but there is an insane plot twist, one that will blow your socks off, I know my socks blew off and now I can't find them. Everyone leaves the room except for me and Sayori. This is the part where shit gets real... It turns out that she knows everything. She is now powerful and will spend every day with me forever and ever.... Or that is until I uninstall the game. Sayori... You... Are... A... Motherfucking... SNAKE! Holy shit, I was just tricked by what I thought was the sweetest character in the game. All of these girls are fucking insane, I am pissed. I thought we were finally playing a normal game with norm...

No time for recaps. DDLC. Game. SCARY. CONTENT WARNING: Discussion of gore. We get a choice of... Well, nothing, but we have to say either yes or no... I'm a yes man, which might end up biting me in the ass later. That letter was not on screen for long enough for me to read. Why is the mood so weird? Good question, Natsuki. Stagnating air is commonly foreshadowing- whatever. We organize ourselves for the festival. Normal. Well, Yuri and I are tasked with... I don't know. Yuri tells Natsuki to shut her fucking mouth... Literally, that's what she says, look. Well, glad to see there's no hostility in this game. Monika tells me to make the damn choice, and she HACKS MY CURSOR TO PICK HER,what a spoiled bitch. WHY IS THERE SWEARING IN THIS GAME JUST NOW? Well, at least I finally get to hit on Monika.  Some shit just got real. With more crazy talk from Yuri. SHE TELLS NATSUKI TO KILL HERSELF, these characters are terrible people. But it's apparently okay because Yuri want...