The Big Ouchie.

Well, Sins Past is done, it's time to look at something that isn't hated by 99.5% of the fanbase... Skin Deep, the storyline right after Sins Past, no one seems to remember it, but it gave us some damn good covers. 

The behind-the-scenes story is very interesting because there is none... Well, I guess J. Michael Straczynski walked into his office one day, and then he got his typewriter ready and started typing away the script, and then on his lunch break, he ate a bagel and drank some coffee... And then he went back to work, and after the script was finished, he handed it off to Mike Deodato Jr. for penciling, and then he did that 3 more times. Oh, and he also told Mark Brooks to draw some flashback sequences.

Welp, looks like this is one of the last regular storylines in this run, let's have a big look into The Amazing Spider-Man #515. Believe it or not, I actually DO have these issues! In the form of the digital TPB.

The cover (by Gary Frank) is nothing special, but it does show Spider-Man kissing his wife before swinging off to probably kiss the Black Cat. 

Peter Parker is late for his job, which is one of the many tropes of Spider-Man comics. This time, though, he was just late because the plot needed him to be late, no Spider-Man involved here. Wait, Peter has a car? Peter knows how to drive? Interesting, I've seen him travel by web so much that I never considered that he probably learned how to drive at one point... Wait, he did have the Spider-Mobile.

Well, it turns out that a fellow teacher got sick and they couldn't find one intime, so they had Peter teach a bunch of these kids about social studies. While teaching, he looks outside a nearby window and sees... His old classmate, Charlie Weiderman... And then he stops the class for our first flashback.

In order to make Teen Peter less of a loser, they have decided to make a character that is somehow MORE pathetic, Charlie, he gets bullied by nearly everyone, but then the flashback ends, and we see more social studies. 

Is the system fair to the rest of us? I mean, we know it's fair for people with advantages like money, power and such, but what about the working class? Are we ever gonna make it big? No time for that, the class is over, and Peter talks to Charlie for a little bit.

Spider-Man 101, if you meet any of your old classmates or any old friend, chances are that they're gonna become a supervillain in the future. Charlie tells Peter that he needs help with doing something that could potentially help the military win battles, and that is... Cover soldiers with a substance that will make their skin rock hard, like Superman! Charlie wants to figure out how to do that! And he's gonna need Peter's help, because he's gonna ask Tony Stark if he can fund this skinsuit project! Which sounds unrealistic at first... But you'll see. Well, Charlie will be back tomorrow for more of the development of this skinsuit. 

Another flashback ensues, and this one shows how Peter eventually befriended Charlie, he was pretty much his only friend and was there for him when no one else could be, which is pretty sweet. Sadly, the other boys at school were just cruel shitheads.

Charlie's funding thing was successful, and Tony is officially on board with the project. Peter and Charlie didn't see each other for a few days but then Peter visits Weiderman and it doesn't exactly go well, I'm no scientist, but I can still tell that trying to rush a scientific project that involves something that goes in contact with human skin is NOT a great idea, and unfortunately, that's what Charlie's gonna do. Oh, and he also lied and said that Peter was gonna be part of the project.

Conveniently, it is right after Peter leaves that something goes wrong, and when something goes wrong in Marvel Comics, it's never a small explosion or something just getting fried, the entire fucking building explodes... Though, to be fair, that was pretty large equipment. 

THE END! 

Well, that wasn't exactly noteworthy, but we have our villain origin set up, which is a good start. Mark Brooks' art was... Eh, pretty mixed, to be honest, but maybe it's just something about the colors. Though, at least it's not Sins Past, amirite? Though, it still has something to do with exploring Peter's past, though, this is a part we never saw before, Peter having a friend? Also, why do people in the flashbacks dress up like today... But then, in AF15, they dress like in the 60's? I guess it doesn't matter what you dress like seeing as how I know a guy that went to school dressed exactly like Peter in AF15... STOP SAYING IT WAS ME! 7/10. At least it's not mystical shit... Though, I did kinda like the mystical shit.

516.

The cover shows Peter watching Charlie melting. Quick! Peter! Grab a cup and start slurping!

The fire department has showed up to see if anyone was caught in the blast... But it was only Charlie. Well, glad to see the janitors made it safe. Oh, and then Charlie wakes up and runs away.

Peter sees the news on TV and swings off to see what's up with Charlie.

In the meantime, let's look at another flashback! This one takes us back to the time Charlie brought a knife to school and was planning to stab the bullys, but then the teacher finds out and Peter decides to take the blame. And then Uncle Ben had to back up Peter's lie for a moment before Peter explains what actually happened.

At the destruction that looks like another 9/11, Peter sees that Charlie is gone, so he goes home and changes back into his Peter clothes before Charlie shows up at his door with metal skin and a missing penis. 

This reminds Peter of the time Charlie showed up at Aunt May's house to hide from the bullies after Charlie slashed their tires. And then the bullies showed up at Parker's home and wanted to beat up Uncle Ben, who then beat the shit out of all of them. And then Ben enters the house again and tells Peter to never hang out with Charlie again. That explains a little bit of why we never saw him in 515 issues + many annuals and other series with over 100 issues.

Charlie suggests that he could put the blame on Spider-Man for some reason instead of turning himself in, but Peter declines helping him with that facade, so Charlie threatens to kill everyone he loves. Well, y'know, this attitude can be explained because they did say the experiment could affect your thinking process, so maybe he's just a little nutty!

Well, wasn't that a crazy issue? Setting up the trouble of the story, which will hopefully be resolved in an issue, or two. Just to show you that this Charlie guy really is a threat... Though, I'm just wondering how he can even move if his skin is rock solid. Still, it kept me entertained when I was 15, I'm entertained now. See? Now I'm having my own little flashback. 7/10.

517. 

The cover shows Spider-Man swinging. Thanks, Gary Frank....

The comic begins with Peter going to MJ's rehearsal to tell her an important message, not before getting distracted with her bedroom farce that has been seen in 0 bedrooms across the world except for maybe the United States. Anyway, he tells MJ to take herself and Aunt May to the fanciest hotel they can find just so a crazy fucking supervillain doesn't kill them.

And then, get this, Charlie hides from the police while looking for... I don't know, money? Whatever, he sees that the TV is playing a news story about Charlie's incident and they interview 2 of his former classmates, which calls for another flashback.

In this one, Peter is absent, but Charlie gets humilliated by those exact classmates... Whom apparently never stopped dating after high school. Just goes to show ya, love always prevails. After the flashback, he SOMEHOW figures out the location of this classmate and kills him. 

Meanwhile, Spider-Man is looking for Charlie, whom currently has no supervillain name, and whaddya know! He was going incognito with the coat and a hat like The Thing. Guy could've disguised himself as a statue. And so, a fight ensues, but it doesn't last very long and Charlie runs away to the Parker house. 

The end.

This one presents the threat actually doing what he was going to do, which is odd, most Spider-Man comics would've had Peter stopping the villain before he could do such thing, but I guess we can't always expect the same shit. 7/10.

518!!!

Wow, look at this cover... Conceptually, this is just another cover showing Spider-Man doing something cool, but if you look at it through the eyes of a big Spidey fan like me, you'll find a beautiful painting by Joe Jusko with just a beautiful looking Spider-Man, when I first saw this, I thought this was a real picture they used for their silly little cover. 

Our comic begins with Spider-Man swinging for a little bit, but then he sees that he left the stove on and now his apartment is burning! So, he enters through the window to see if everyone's safe, only to find our ol' pal Charlie completely trashing the place, but then Spidey is like "NOOOO MY STUFFED ANIMALS" and starts beating the shit out of Charlie before they both remember that fighting in a burning building is not ideal and they both run away, with Spider-Man collapsing. I want you guys to take note of this, because it'll be very important later in the run.

He dreams about past Peter and Charlie and current Peter and Charlie arguing over stuff. So, can Peter ever be forgiven for what he did years ago AND what he did now? First of all, he didn't necessarily do anything, and second of all- Oh, nevermind, he woke up. 

He goes to Tony Stark for help. I'll say this in a future review. And he asks if he can give him the most expensive thing he can use to defeat this guy. Tony agrees, I mean, if Spider-Man asked ME for a favor, I'd also say yes in a heartbeat. Though, if it was you know who, I'd say yes in 0.5 heartbeats.

So, Spidey fights Charlie again for a little bit before webbing him up into a giant web ball reminiscent of Marvel vs. Capcom and throwing him into Tony Stark's "freeze some fuckers"-inator.

While Charlie is freezing to death, Peter once again reminisces of the time Charlie had to go to a new place where he didn't get bullied. Charlie's fucking dead now.

Well, looks like the day is saved, right? NO. See, MJ calls Peter to let him know that Charlie burnt down Aunt May's house. Whoops!

The run will continue when Peter Parker meets... The NEW Avengers.

Well, this is what was supposed to be the satisfying finale. It was pretty damn good, and I definitely think it's overrated, though, I'm still feeling mixed on some of the art and even some of the retcons here. All in all, I think it was... Yeah, good! 8/10. A forgotten story that actually caused a big change.

Footnotes:

There are no footnotes. None that I know of...