Lame-Ass Storytelling 101.
LAST TIME: Doc Ock made new arms and used them to beat the shit out of Spider-Man and Gold Goblin.
The Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 6) #29 and 30. Written by Zeb Wells and Ed McGuinness.
Well, judging by the cover, ANYTHING could happen in this issue, but it's most likely gonna feature Spider-Man.And so, it does. The issue begins with ol' Spidey waking up to find himself being carried by J. Jonah Jameson and Doc Ock's robotic arms in a splash page that imitates a better comic that I wish I were reading instead of this shit. (Amazing Fantasy #15, from all the way back in 1962).
Ock has taken Norman to a place where he can regain his memories of being the Green Goblin while also showing moments from comics that I wish I were reading instead of this shit. (Superior Spider-Man's Goblin Nation arc...*)
*Sidenote: Why was issue 31 the series finale if there were 2 issues afterwards? We'll get to that eventually.
Back with JJJ and Spidey, they are debating about how they're gonna stop Ock, and they find out that Ock's arms have teeth that are actually not teeth and they're like little wire thingies that connect to your brain. MEANWHILE: A robbery is stopped by a spider guy... Wait, I thought Spidey was with Jonah? Well, it's actually my favorite character in the entire run, Rek-Rap, who is now being a true hero. God bless him. He doesn't show up for the rest of the arc.
Well, meanwhile, Ock is still threatening Norman and shit, and Spidey modifies Ock's arms and puts on his classic costume... Why? Wouldn't it be more convenient to wear the epic battle suit?
Ock injects some goblin serum thing on Norman's SUPER BUILT arm and the issue ends on a cliffhanger.
Same shit as the last issue. Though I forgot what rating I gave it, so I'm gonna give this one a 7/10 for trying.
The cover is pretty standard, I guess.Norman is actually now immune to the Goblin formula... I have not read the rest of the run, so I wouldn't know if the Goblin persona actually came back. Ock is PISSED, so he starts beating the shit out of Norman.
In an amusing twist, Spidey's new robotic arms make him talk like how he did all the way back in the days of the Superior Spider-Man series, which means that Spider-Man now talks like a rude jerk. Anyway, Spidey finally swoops in to save Norman Osborn. There's an awesome fight scene and stuff between Ock and Peter, they're also calling themselves names, and the shirtless Norman also kicks some ass.
They win, Spidey takes off his shitty robot arms, and Norman reflects on the events that have been going on in the last few issues. The end or whatever the fuck.
This issue is pretty lame-o. Still, I'd give it a 7/10 because it's not as bad as issue 26. It's no [INSERT BEST SPIDEY COMIC EVER HERE], though.
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