4 Random Issues: THE HULK!

Aw man, I am so looking forward to this. Believe it or not, I don't need Wikipedia to tell you the story of how the Hulk was created. Stan Lee says he was actually inspired by monster movies, films like Frankenstein and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, he wanted the hero and villain to be one in the same, and he also wanted to show that the monster was actually misunderstood. So, just like with pretty much everything, he asked Jack Kirby to do everything while he added words and took 70% of the credit.

So, anyway, The Incredible Hulk #1. Written by Stan Lee, drawn by Jack Kirby.

The cover features the Hulk towering over Bruce Banner, look, he's huge! Everyone is just terrified of him, they're all yellow for some reason. "The strangest man of all time!!" You can tell this comic released before I was born. "Fantasy as you like it!" Gee wiz! "Is he man or monster? Or... is he both?" One thing that was always clear to me, even as a child, is that the Hulk wasn't actually a monster. One thing we should address is that as you can clearly see in this cover, Hulk is gray instead of green... The Hulk was originally gray because I DON'T KNOW, but they had a problem keeping the color consistent! So, they ended up making him green... Which was stupid because the Hulk's green shade varies from issue to issue. 

Just like with the first appearance of the Fantastic Four, I'm gonna make this review as brief as possible because there's 3 more issues to review.

Doctor Bruce Banner is working on a military project called the Gamma Bomb alongside a guy named Igor, who is secretly a spy from Russia. There is a careless teenager in the desert, right as they're about to test the Gamma Bomb. Banner asks Igor to hold the countdown, but he doesn't because he wants Banner dead for some reason... Anyway, Banner saves the kid from his doom but he doesn't manage to save himself from the blast, and he gets irradiated with the Gamma rays, which according to Wikipedia, only cause higher risks of cancer and stochastic health risks... HE SHOULD BE DEAD, Thankfully, for those that want The Hulk to be more realistic, we have the Marvel Ruins version of the Hulk, where he actually dies... Or he becomes a mass of green tumors that is now held by the CIA... 

Anyway, Banner is safe, or is he? Well, later that night, after having small talk with Rick Jones (the kid he saved), but then suddenly, a geiger counter starts going crazy, and Banner turns into the Incredible Hulk, FINALLY, That's what I've been waiting for, screw Banner, I wanna see big gray guy break stuff! Hulk escapes and shoves Rick out of his way, the military is obviously gonna do something about this. One of them says "WE HAVE TO STOP THAT HULK!" 

Meanwhile, Igor thinks that Banner is dead, which means time to rob his shit. But the Hulk shows up and kicks some Igor ass. Turns out that Hulk hates Banner, this is the introduction of a classic staple of the Hulk comics, him hating the other him. The sun rises and Hulk goes back to his Banner form. Everyone in the military is like "Must've been a bear or something" and they leave, but none of them thought "Must've been Banner", Hulk used to keep his identity a secret. 

Part 4 of this one story, Igor is in jail, but he sends a signal to Russia through his fucking fingernails. God damnit 1960's. The receiver of this message is the Gargoyle, the 3rd ugliest man in the world behind me and the Mole Man. Later that day, Banner and Rick are going for a nice sunset drive, when Banner starts to turn into the Hulk again. Obviously, if you put someone with the intelligence of a toddler in charge of the wheel, you're gonna have an accident, so the car crashes and The Hulk rises. Rick was fine, though... One thing I should point out, on Marvel's digital comic, Hulk is gray in one specific panel, but in the original panel and in some reprints, he's green!

Meanwhile, Betty Ross (she was there earlier, I forgot to tell you) is with her father Thunderbolt Ross (who was also there) and Betty is paranoid about all the shit going on lately. I'd be worried too if a bunch of superheroes started showing up around the world. Betty goes outside and whaddya know, she finds Hulk and she's so scared that she faints... Hulk is pretty ugly. 

It only took the Gargoyle less than a day for him to get to New Mexico, wonder if he's staying at the Albuquerque Holiday Inn, where the towels are all so fluffy! Anyway, he shoots The Hulk and Rick with mind control bullets... Yeah, and he takes them to Russia. But by the time it took them to get there, Hulk had turned back into Banner. Gargoyle is obviously baffled; how can Banner live like that? Well, after this issue, his life did turn into a living hell. Banner helps Gargoyle turn back into a normal not ugly human, but he doesn't manage to give him any hair. Whatever, Banner and Rick are sent back into America.

10/10. This comic is a classic, it's also a good bedtime story to tell the kids I'll never have. The art is pretty standard for the time, and it's also Jack Kirby so I can't really complain. The Hulk isn't really like the one we know today, but he's still pretty cool. And the origin is pretty standard for a Marvel Superhero origin in the 1960's, it really bums me out that this hasn't been adapted into the movies... Except for that one scene in Ang Lee's Hulk movie, I mean, it was sorta like the original, but nothing at all like the original at the same time. And Louis Leterrier's MCU flick adapted the 1970's TV show origin, so what gives? Gimme a Hulk movie that's accurate.

Before we get to tell you about the next issue, let's talk about MY story with The Hulk. When I was a kid, my dad told me about Spider-Man, and I saw his movie and I liked it, he told me that there were multiple superheroes like him, and one of them caught my eye, it was the Jade Giant himself. I saw both of his movies and I enjoyed them. For a while, Hulk was my favorite hero! I would collect Hulk toys; I would read his comics... The ones that I could read, anyway... And I would use my Hulk Hands! over time, I started getting more into Spider-Man, but I have a soft spot for The Hulk.

This next one is Hulk: Gray #1 by Jeph Loeb and Tim Sale. This team has worked on other stuff before, like the critically acclaimed series "Spider-Man: Blue", which I have yet to read. But Hulk: Gray, this one, it's pretty crazy. I was surprised to see that this comic was reprinted on Incredible Hulk #600. 

The cover features the Hulk standing... Seems to be a common theme today. There's no background, just the Gray Hulk standing and looking angrily at the reader... I'd complain about the laziness of this cover but I actually like it and the covers do seem to have more stuff happening as the series goes on! I think it's neat, unlike the fucking cover for Spider-Man (2022) #1.

So, the comic begins with Dr. Bruce Banner at Leonard Samson's office, talking about how Banner feels, Samson shows him pictures of Thunderbolt Ross, Rick Jones, and Betty Ross. We get a flashback to the events of Hulk #1, and the reaction of Ross after seeing how they let the bomb go off while Banner was still outside. Ross takes Betty outside to talk about how she reminds him of her mother... After all these years of knowing Hulk lore, I never once asked myself who Betty's mom was. 

We see a retelling of when Banner first turned into the Hulk, and it is actually a pretty good scene! Banner thinks that maybe this was the price to pay for unleashing the gamma bomb into the world. The issue ends with The Hulk standing near Betty's home. Banner and Hulk having the exact same thought... Betty...

I like this comic, it's a good story, the artwork is beautifully drawn, which is to be expected from Tim Sale's work, and it's just a good read. Wish I had the other 5 issues. 9/10.

This wasn't the only reason why I picked Incredible Hulk #600, let's have a look!

This is the cover, drawn by Alex Ross, showing THE HULK running towards the reader... Hey, slow down! I didn't do anything! In the background, we have an explosion, and THE RED HULK... Real creative, there, Loeb.

The first story is presented by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Ed McGuinness, creators that I really like. The story begins with Ben Urich telling us about a story that will never see print, which will reveal the identity of the Red Hulk... Fucking idiot, google exists, and I'm pretty sure it existed in 2009. So, after the events of World War Hulk, he was contained by the government, but there are now 2 Hulks, one green, one red... Who told this information to Ben? None other than the She-Hulk! So, I guess that makes 3 Hulks now.

She-Hulk, Peter Parker (yay), Samson and Ben are all at Las Vegas... Which makes me wonder why no one is smiling, c'mon guys, everyone is happy in Las Vegas! They're here to investigate who the Red Hulk is... Oh shit, this is M.O.D.O.K.'s base! Shiiiit... While trying to be stealthy, Samson turns into... Bad Samson and She-Hulk tries to stop him. Red Hulk finds Ben, but luckily, Spider-Man was here to stop him, or at least distract him for a while... Red Hulk catches Spidey and holds him in the same way that I hold my action figures... Lucky for our old webhead, the tube containing Banner was near. Banner sees this scene unfold and instantly turns into the Hulk.

Hulk and Rulk are fighting, Hulk asks the important question, who the hell is the Red Hulk? Well, Rulk manages to overpower the Hulk and just drains the green out of Banner 45 seconds before a bomb goes off. Bruce Banner can no longer turn into the Hulk. Time to make like a couple of hockey sticks and get the puck out of here because, y'know, bomb. 

A-Bomb (Rick Jones) shows up out of nowhere to save Banner, Samson and She-Hulk are trapped by the Red Hulk, and MODOK stares in shock. The bomb goes off, this scene is reminiscent of the gamma bomb scene in Hulk #1, but this time Rick is saving Banner. Ben is asking where Peter is, but lucky for him, he shows up! Wonder where he was all this time! He missed everything. All that was left to do was write the story, but Red Hulk tells him to not publish it... We're not gonna learn who the Red Hulk is until much later, aren't we? The end.

A big missed opportunity in this story was revealing who the Red Hulk is. I know who he is now because google, but this must've been a big disappointment for fans back in 2009. Still, I like this story, the art is nice, and it's pretty standard for a milestone issue of the time. There's 3 more stories here, let's check them out! 

A Hulk of a different color, by Stan Lee and Rodney Buchemi. The Hulk is just wandering about and multiple citizens are shocked because he's not breaking stuff, except for one news station car. He goes into the forest and finds the Red Hulk. They start to fight and shit, and there's a helicopter reporting this shit, but the pilots are Stan Lee and... I think that's Rodney? I don't know, I've never seen Rodney's face. Before they can report this amazing sight, a Wendihulk attacks them. 

So they fight for a couple more hours, and Galactus shows up to stop the Red Hulk, but Galactus is colorblind and cannot tell them apart. Lol. Well, they had to end the story somehow!

This story feels like something I would write if I had to throw together a story in less than a day, but I still think it's alright

This next story is about Lyra, the new She-Hulk. Brought to you by Fred Van Lente, Michael Ryan and Salva Espin. It's about She-Hulk fighting some monster guys. I basically just skimmed through it, it looks boring as hell. 

FINAL STORIES: Hulk Driving and HulkDonald's by Audrey Loeb and Chris Giarruso... Best things I've ever read. 10/10.

So, how was Hulk 600? Well, the main story is okay, 7/10. Stan Lee's story was also okay, 6/10, Lyra just doesn't interest me, and Mini-Marvel's is the peak of fiction! So, I'd give this issue an 8/10. Bonus point for Spider-Man, bonus point for that Marvel Bishoujo ad they had, those figures are HOT! Oh, and bonus point for that cover gallery, now I can make my Hulk checklist.

Last issue we're gonna look at is Hulk #8 from 1999 by Erik Larsen and Ron Garney.

This cover depicts Hulk vs. Wolverine, a classic rivalry. This kind of looks like the scene from the cover of Incredible Hulk 181 but from a different angle, it's cool!

This story is kinda lame so let me tell you about this volume of the Hulk.

Waaaayyy back in the 60's, the Hulk series was actually canceled after issue 6, and Hulk stories were transferred to Tales to Astonish, which was renamed to the Incredible hulk on issue number 102. Then the series was canceled in 1999 (just like a lot of titles back then) and relaunched as just "Hulk" (renamed back to Incredible Hulk on issue 12), making this volume 3 of the Hulk.

Hulk and Wolverine are fighting in a forest for a bit, there's this whole subplot with some guy in a blue cape whose name I do not know, but he's wondering why they are tracking the Hulk... BONUS INSERT, Spider-Man: Fast Lane! Part 1... Couldn't they put this at the end of the comic instead of the middle? 

Hulk and Wolverine are still fighting and shit, and Hulk is holding a girl, if Wolverine attacks, Hulk's gonna use her as a human shield or whatever. He drops the girl and THROWS WOLVERINE SKY HIGH!

Another subplot with the guys tracking the Hulk, there's more fighting, the media is now talking about the Hulk. Wolverine and Hulk are now fighting in the middle of the city, but then Hulk turns back into Banner. He explains to Logan that there is a mad man trying to take over the Hulk's mind, controlling him and going on killing sprees. Wolverine leaves and the issue is over. I wouldn't be able to tell you how the story is resolved because I don't have the other issues. 

What I really like about the letter's page is that THE HULK himself actually answers your letters. Why don't they do that anymore? Back in the days of La Prensa's Spider-Man, you could talk to Hombre Araña himself! And back in the days of Gwenpool, you could communicate with her! Nowadays you can only talk to a lousy editor about how unhappy you are with the stories.

Issue was... Eh... 6/10, I really like the art style of the time, the story was okay.

The post is over. What did we learn today? We learned that the Hulk is cool and awesome, another timeless story from the guys over at Marvel. 

That's it for this one, I'll see you guys later. Next characters... I have no idea.

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